Families are complex and, at time, extremely entangled systems. They can bring us great joy. They can also bring us great pain.
Very few of us go through life with our family relationships perfectly in tact. (My father-in-law used to say “Just because they’re your family, it doesn’t mean you have to like them!”)
And parenting, (that job we get without the manual) brings out our best, and our worst as we attempt to navigate and negotiate the various stages of our child’s development using the skills and awareness available to us at the time.
Inevitably we repeat patterns from our own experience of being parented – in some cases in spite of trying to do the opposite! We don’t always get it right. But it’s never too late to learn new ways to communicate and set boundaries for ourselves, and to get the most out of our family interactions.
Do any of these apply to you?
Our kid(s) are out of control
Our kids “run” us
Our blended family isn’t working
As parents, we’re just not on the same page
I feel out of control
I feel like an ogre
I (we) have trouble setting boundaries
I’m not the kind of parent I really want to be
I feel more like my child’s “friend” than a parent
My child tends to “parent” me
I feel judged by other family members
I have a lot of issues with my mother/father/brother/sister, etc.
I struggle at family functions
I want more contact with my family